Archive for the March 2008 Category

Lizards are DISGUSTING!!!

Posted in March 2008 with tags , , , , , , , , on March 30, 2008 by globalglamour

Hello peeps! OMG, it feels like it’s been forever since I wrote in my blog! Lol, obviously it hasn’t; anyways I’ve been really busy with hmmm….oh practicaly everything! I’m about to take my AS Level exams back in England in May/June roundabouts and uhmm…I always plan to study (no really I do; I have like a diary saying MUST STUDY BIOLOGY – hmm let me tell from experience that it soooo doesn’t work); quite frankly I think I’m slightly pathetic!

OMG, you’d never believe what happened to me the other day…

Whilst I was/tried sweeping the floor -yes I was cleaning- I found that I hadn’t gathered any dirt, now either my house is really clean all by it’s self or the dirt is just hiding!! Anywayz I thought that, you know I had to find some dirt to prove to my parents that I had done something. At the time I thought that it was a well good idea; I got my brush/broom thing and found a tiny lil’ area full of shit (not real shit but you know dust)!

I started sticking my brush in gathering all this dirt in a neat little pile when all in a fucking second, I saw a swarm of digusting dust covered lizards making a break towards me!!! I fucking screeched like a banshee and ran the fuck away!!! Ewww….they just looked so slimy and crawly!!! Shit; it’s giving me crazy shivers just thinking about it!!

I’m scarred for life; no people really I am! Anyway I have to get back to studying…grrr….

Love you lots!




Conrad VS Montag

Posted in March 2008 with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2008 by globalglamour

Hmm…Lauren Conrad versus Heidi Montag this is such a publicized dilema, lol they make it sound worse than it actually is! I mean aren’t there worst bitch fights than these two?? I know it’s a reality show and that they should moderate their language and shit, but lol didn’t they say REALITY; hmm not very realistic to me…

Let’s review these catty women:

Lauren Katherine Conrad….ooohhh….looking saucy don’t you think?? Does anyone know how to put that make-up on??? Please comment or e-mail me!!! 



Her full name sounds kinda weird, lol; right now she’s just kicked off the premiere party of the “Hills Season 3” – wait is this her job, does she get money outta it?? Anywayz I’m finding her slightly annoying nowadayz she’s always such a goody goody; acting as though you know she’s a saint about Brody and Audrina – which is pretty stupid – I would care and blow my cap off!!! I mean that’s well bitchy, I bet she had some sudden urge to pounce on her and rip their skins off…hehehe. Well in “Laguna Beach” she was my favourite character; she still is my favourite character but I dunno she’s getting boring…nothing amazing happening than the typical…

Hmm…but that well-known shouting competition between her and Heidi Montag…that’s about as exciting it got for me, and even then Lauren was the typical “I’m not going to swear and be the good one and walk away”. Grrr…if some bitch spread a rumour about me videoing myself having sex, -which hasn’t happened lol…yet…hahaha joke!- that reached my parents’ ears all the way back home, I would fucking slap the whore and grind her puny body into the nearest wall! Wait what did Lauren do?? This was her great come back was: “You know what you did!” – what the fuck?!?!

I think Heidi won that round.

Heidi Montag. Shit, can she look any more demented??



I mean does anyone know how many plastic surgeries she’s under gone??? I know she’s had a nose and boob job; and maybe a chin…oh no that’s what I thought she should have lol. Assuming that everyone’s watched her video “Higher” – you all then know that her hands were spread out like crazy out there! Bless her she’s trying though; lol I really don’t get why she just didn’t hire a producer director person…then she would have a lot less hate mail! And is it me or is she actually posing for the paparazzi…pretty hypocritical after she’s just told everyone that Lauren is so stuck in the Hollywood biz.

Quite frankly I think that little miss fake booby skinny bat fingered bikini woman is slightly jealous that the show is centred round lil’ miss goody two shoes.

I’d prefer the goody girl over the fake bitch any day. What about you people??

Oh yeah another issue: Spencer Pratt, his last name suits him completely. Actucally them two are good for each other, don’t you think?? He’s like 20’s why does he dress like my 11 year old brother and he really looks like this weird cartoon;

Spencer meets his long lost cartoon brother…gives me the creeps and he also looks like Ryan Tedder that One Republic lead singer….

beavis-writing.jpgspency.jpg.and.ryan-tedder.jpg hmph!

What d’you lot think?? lol






Posted in March 2008 with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 23, 2008 by globalglamour

Lol, I feel like I’m dying today…

Here are the photos of me out with M.J…

Lol I dunno how to take a proper photo…wat a dumbarse


This is M.J. after eating a shrimp…ewww…
Hehehe posing after peeing…lol I washed my hands!
Mint Cupcake…mmm….

Ahhh…cupcake heaven…blogger meet peppermint, peppermint meet blogger
People, you have just met my one true crazy love, lol forget that they’re lethal, making me fat spotty and broke – I don’t need them…I just you know kinda want them…hmm…evil fuckerz…grrr…
Hey, does anyone know if cupcakes are pastries??




Posted in March 2008 with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 22, 2008 by globalglamour

‘ello, people!! Have you ever looked at anything and just wanted to bite it thinking it’s some sort of fantastical sweet or secretly delicious thing that you have have have to just eat?? LOL! I have, it’s fucking MAC’s latest make-up line “Henrietta”!!! I haven’t seen it in real life or anything but the pictures of it look so mmm….yummy!!!

Seriously, it’s making me fat. Lol, I bet your wandering how because it’s just make-up; but NO you can…every time I look at the bloody thing I feel hungry for something sweet, and so I take my fat arse over to the fridge, cupboard or my secret stash of goodies and binge like crazy!!! Look at the pic. at you’ll understand why and this bloggerz like on a MAC make-up craze and a bit anti-Vanessa Hudgens hehehe.

Anyway…today I went out with my very intellectual friend called hmmm…I’ll call him M.J…lol all the way from the isolated area up in the mountains; who funnily enough loves his dogs! I guess bloody well what!!! I have fucking dog flea bites all over my bloody body!! How the fuck?? I’m so pissed of, grrrrrrrrr…I hate them bloody dogs! What’s fucking ironic is that I’m scratching like one, lol I have a bite behind my ear…it’s funny but also very very very annoying!!! I think I got it from the sofa in the mall I feel like crying, I’m dog infected. – I’ll post the pics up tomorrow –

Does anyone know how long this itch for?? Cuz I think I’m losing my mind…I hate feeling ITCHY!

Actually puppies nowadayz are very fashionable for celebrities!!! I’m thinking why??

1. paris_hilton2.jpg      2. nicole_richie.jpg 


3. hillary-and-dog.jpg     4. mischa-barton-dog-400a0423.jpg       5. ashlee_simpson.jpg 


Hmm…maybe they genuinely adopted their dogs at around-about the same time, hehehe funny coincidence?? What d’you lot think??

Talk to you lot later!



Dumbledore & Gandalf are GAY!

Posted in March 2008 with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 21, 2008 by globalglamour

Lol, why did no one tell me that Gandalf (the actor) was gay?? And oh wait in the book Rowling actually made Dumbledore gay…I’m not anti-gay people or anything; it’s just that you have the picture of a humble great wizard person and all of a sudden J.K. gets bored and makes him GAY! WTF? And wait…why is Gandalf gay…lol stupid question…it shocks me every time, I always thought that he had a fucking wife!!!

To be honest it sort of taints their image to me…wise old men with long white beards wearing long ‘holy’ robe-y things and all of a sudden *BAM* their doing it in the bushes. Those sneaky bastards! Who else knew about this??

Look it’s a sweet innocent looking happy HOMOSEXUAL Dumbledore:


Lol, why’s he gay…nooo…it’s ok I’ll always think of him as a straight old wizard….now time to look at Gandalf and his one true love…I’m being dead serious!


Hmm…actually here he doesn’t look like a wise old wizard too me…lol, his partner doesn’t exactly look that good either!

LOL! what d’you lot think about this couple?!?!






Posted in March 2008 on March 21, 2008 by globalglamour

LOL! You’d never guess what!!! For those people who don’t read the news…I have something o so shocking to reveal to you!! This was all over the internet and kinda happened over a week ago…lol I’ll make a lil’ story out of it anyway….

Once upon a time there was a very horny couple sitting in their red toyota car, just drinking a couple of beers or something; anywayz all of a sudden Crystal (24) had a sudden urge to have wild sex in Mount Zion’s Primitive Baptist Church (who knows why??). Haha doing it on the alter covered in red wax was just such a saucy idea Matthew (28) couldn’t refuse!!!

It would’ve been a great sex story to tell your kids if only they weren’t caught pratically naked hiding somewhere in the church by the police; with their torch lights and guns pointing in all directions!!! How fucking hilarious! Apparently Crystal was caught first, and taken into custody…lol…then she told the police that Matthew was hiding somewhere in the church. What a sour bitch!! Just cuz she got caught first. Lol he was found underneath the church – I’m confused how did that happen??

Lol this is them….

crystal-perve.jpg   …the happy couple…   matthew-perve.jpg

Their charges were “burglary and mischief”….I never knew you could get arrested for mischief lol, so does that mean I could you know, have my little brother and sister arrested?? No offense or anything but that’s just a ridiculous charge!

I bet the pope or priest was like: “You blasphemous, dirty, minging, sex-humping bunnies! God shall curse you…” and all that…but no…instead he said: “I’m not going to judge them” – wateva I bet he already has! Shame I wanted the deacon/priest/pope to go on a witch hunt the couple down or something!!

Oh yeah, when the police asked why they humped like possesed bunnies there she answered: “I wanted a spiritual and sexual experience” – hmmm…why not buy a whole load of crucifixes and holy stuff and pretend they were in a church already?? LOL! some people…hehe

Hmm…I think I might reveal a couple of sex stories about old classmates…hahaha…I’ll never ever understand why boys would ever fuck the ugliest girlz in that school! Maybe they got delusional, yeah very delusional – oh well, it’s not like I’m going out with them!

Tell me what you think people!



A World W/out Guinea-Pigs…

Posted in March 2008 on March 20, 2008 by globalglamour

Hey hey to all my beloved bloggers!! – those few anyway lol – d’you know what I think about animals?? I don’t mean to be anti-animalistic (or wateva people call it…) it’s just that I can’t seem to stand animals with tails!! It just really creeps me out, it’s like a sixth finger on a person…lol no offense to six-fingered people :} really I think the only animals I can stand are fish and guinea-pigs actually I had a guinea pig once…lol am so sad now hahaha no! They stunk so badly!!! My younger sister, Debbie had a small black one and my older sister had a fat brown one and another which was a black and white long-haired guinea-pig! I only loved my own!!! hehehe Lil’ bitches never cleaned the hutch!! Grr…only me! Them little buggars kept pissing and shitting on me! Maybe they thought I was a moving toilet or sumthin. awww my tiny puppets are gone…………..I can’t believe in Ecuador they roast them – apparently they taste yummmy……ewww….I’m vegetarian so I wouldn’t know LOL!

Look at these well cute guinea’s…………………..




This one’s Jerry………………Amy, Lola, Jazz, Co and Tim………..and Alister…………….

Lol, I’m so sad! I reckon without guinea-pigs Ecuadorians would starve, I think I’m gonna start a petition or fund against guinea-pig eaters they’re well mean, they’re piggy haters!!! Dam it! Nooooo……………….actually does anyone know if guinea-pigs have tails?? If they do I will be totally disturbed…and completely upset 😦 ! Then I’ll just have to stick with fish! God, that’d be boring!
People at my old school were such fuckers, they kept saying that guinea-pigs were ugly, bastards I wanna fire a massive torpedo piggy poo at them! Hahaha; they’re such fuckers. What do they know about anything??? Oh, I have a pet that I can just turn off nowadayz…I know I may be too old for this, but does anyone know about “Tamagotchi’s” lol I can just turn them off/pause whenever…which is well convenient. Hahaha…hehehe…

This is what my new lil’ baby looks like:


Anywayz…gotta go…just one insie bitsie question…should I start a “Save the Guinea-Pigs” petition?? (they’ll soon become extinct! then I’ll have no furry friends!!!)

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